i'm pretty... poor.

whatshouldwecallme:

Honest truth.

Today kiddies, I am here to talk to you about eBay.

Yes, eBay.

If you are not already using eBay to satisfy your lust for impulse shopping, you are missing a vital resource to save cash. You can truly find anything on eBay. Sure, it’s hit or miss…but so’s an H&M. (And you still shop there, don’t you?!?!) The wonders of eBay never cease, and it’s a GREAT way to save some money and still get those brands you quote-unquote ‘DIE’ over. (As in, ‘like omg I’m DYING over that DVF blazer!’)

Case and point: I will show you a picture of a gorgeous outfit (taken from pinterest…yet another fabulous resource, but that’s for another day!) and the ACTUAL cost of that beautiful ensemble. THEN… after they resuscitate you from the sticker shock & you begin to breathe again, I will show you how eBay can re-create that look…the same look with many of the SAME BRANDS… for a fraction of the price.

Let’s begin the lesson, shall we?

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I am utterly sorry that I have been MIA for a month. I’m sure you all were questioning my safety and were just about to send out the search dogs. Don’t bother, I’m alive.

I wish I could say I was doing something heroic or worthwhile in that month, like fighting off soccer moms & NYU grad students at a New York City sample sale or donating my badly worn-out Sperrys and chino shorts to an orphaned preppy kid in need… but sadly no. I was just lazy & didn’t feel like writing. (Doops!)

…and, for the record, I am never getting rid of those Sperrys.

I’m poor. Poor and terribly irresponsible with my money.

Sure, I’m struggling paycheck to paycheck. My $800/month school loan payments have kicked in, living in the city of Philadelphia is more expensive than funding a third world country, & I’ve already sold the rights to my first born son just to fill up my gas tank every week.

So a normal, rational human being would say, “Self, I really can’t afford to spend $195 on those Camelia Wedge Espadrilles from Tory Burch. Sure, they’re cuter than a puppy-kitty hybrid named Muffin with rainbows shooting out of its adorable little eyeballs, but I reaaaalllly need to pay my rent this week.”

But let’s face it anonymous readers, I’m not normal, nor rational! Hell, those shoes are already sitting in my closet.

This blog is for everyone like me. For everyone who survives on retail therapy and impulse buys… but then spirals into a sudden depression about personal finances so deep, even a pint of Ben & Jerry’s Cherry Garcia won’t bring you a shred of hope in the dark abyss that is eventual poverty. (But don’t think I’ve even considered returning anything. That’s sacrilegious to even THINK about that and you should be ashamed of yourself for even suggesting the idea!)

This is a list of rules to live our “I buy generic grocery store brands but wouldn’t be caught dead in denim cutoffs that cost less than $98” lives by.

I refuse to let minimum wage ruin my wardrobe.

-s